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A Widow's Dare to Love

Day 13

5/29/2021

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 “And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.” Mark 3:25

Love fights fair.
​

How many times have I found myself fighting ME? 
Whether with my weight, my age, my eyesight, or any number of other things that I don’t like about this body.
Then, there’s the arguments I have with me over a thought, a word spoken, maybe something not done. 
If there was an award for second-guessing, and for arguing with yourself? 
Yeah, me. 
I would so get that award.
Probably daily! 

And how many times does one thought lead to a thousand others, until I am off chasing some kind of rabbit in a hole? 
Momma always said that it’s ok to talk to yourself ...
But if you ever start answering yourself, then that’s trouble. 
Well, Momma ... I’m in trouble! 
I not only talk to myself, and answer myself ...
But I have these knock-down-drag-out arguments with myself. 
What does that say about my sanity? Lol 

Paul said it best when he said - I know to do what’s right, but I don’t.
I know what not to do, and I do it anyway.
Wretched man that I am! 
Romans 7:14-25    
                                                                 
Oh how I know those words! 
I feel those words today ... so many times!
Over and over and over again. 

How do I fight fair with my self?
Thru prayer. 
Thru reading the Word.
Believing God’s Promises.
Holding on to Him in the fight.

Because, honestly? 
What good does it do for me to continue spending time and energy on these arguments, and I don’t see the change from them? 

How many of these arguments with myself have taken me out of prayer?
How many have interrupted the reading of God’s Word?
How many arguments with myself have taken my focus from God? 
Yeah, I’m seeing the change ... 
I think I’m getting this part. 

My body is a Temple of the Holy Spirit. 
My life is not my own. I have been bought with a price. 
It is no longer I who lives, but Christ Who lives in me. 
We wrestle not against flesh and blood. 
​
Lord, please help me to remember these Promises of Truth today. 
This warrior woman is but a child. 
A very weak and heart weary child. 
But Your child.
I no longer want to argue with myself. 
When it comes time for confrontation and combat with my self - 
Please, stand me firm in the Lord, and in the power of Your Might. 
Sometimes I will need to just breathe and be still, be quiet. 
And then, the times when I will need to do more. 
Please, show me what to do. 
In Jesus’ Name I pray
Thank You. 
I love You. 
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    Life goes on -
    even if.

    "Till death do us part" became a reality of my life, after almost 35 years with Rick.
    April 23, 2015, he went home.
    My heart broken, my life shattered.
    The ashes of grief overwhelming and suffocating.
    But one breath at a time.
    One moment.
    One memory.
    And here I am today, just a little over 6 years later. Learning to breathe, to live, to laugh, to love
    - without him.
     I grew up with Rick in my heart, and by my side.
    It is now time for me to grow old.
    I love you Rick & I miss you like crazy.

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Website designed & developed by Margaret McCoy

​
God is God over the storms in my life & world -
and I am His.
Trusting in Him. Holding to His Promises as He holds me.

​
Learning to laugh, to love, & to live ... again - without Rick, but with God

Life goes on ... even when we don't want it to.

Great grief is indicative of a great Love.

Rick, my Sweetheart.
Margaret, his Beloved.
Always & Forever.
​
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©Margaret McCoy, the Queen of Kamelot Coffee 
  • Coffee Love
  • My shoebox
    • Who, or what, am I?
    • Way of Wonder
    • Did You Know?
    • Stay the Course
    • Respect, Honor, Gratitude
    • We Remember
    • Favorite Links
    • Junk Drawer
  • Scattered Feathers
    • Faith Statement
    • Hope in Song
    • Memes to Remember
    • Coffee Love Images
    • Moments to Memories
    • Kids & grandkids
    • Those Gone Before Me
    • Roots & Wings
    • Love Notes
    • ^Angel^ Memories
  • Hungry?
    • Appetizers
    • Bread
    • Casseroles
    • Crockpot Love
    • Meats
    • Veggies
    • Desserts - oh my!
  • Life is an Adventure!
    • Calendar
  • Contact Me