Day 4

“How precious to me are Your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I would count them, they are more than the sand. I awake, and I am still with You.”  Psalm 139:17-18

Love is thoughtful. 

As I write these verses, I am taken back to that first love that Rick and I shared. 
For 35 years. 
We had our dry times, just like all married couples do. 
But for the most part, we were so in love with one another that we could not wait to hear each other’s voice! 
There were so many times that he would wake me up in the middle of the night asking me some trivial question,
    I would answer, he would hold me close and kiss my forehead. 
The next morning I would ask him what it was about. 
His answer? 
“I just wanted to hear your voice.” 

How often would he pitch a penny to me and say, “A penny for your thoughts.” 
And he meant it! 
He wanted to hear what I was thinking, at that moment in time.
 
He would be in a reflective and quiet mood at times, and I would sidle up next to him, kiss his cheek and ask him what was going thru that wonderful mind of his ... 
   he would smile that precious smile, look down at me, and say, “You really want to know?” 
YES!!! 
And we would talk - sometimes no more than a word or two, sometimes an hour or longer. 

I do not remember many mornings in those 35 years where we did not take a moment as we woke up to just hold one another and think how amazing it was to be together - thru it all. 

Long before cell phones were a “thing”, Rick would call me many times each day 
   - he would stop at a pay phone, or borrow the phone wherever he was - just to say, 
“Hey, I can’t talk long, just wanted to see how you are doing, and let you know where I am 
   ... but most of all, to say “I Love YOU”.” 

We wrote each other notes, or bought cards for one another when we could afford it. 
Even made cards for one another. 
I have notes from Rick that he wrote on scraps of paper or napkins. 

It seemed that everything we did was centered around the other one. 
We were in love, totally, completely, helplessly IN LOVE with one another. 

These verses.
That’s the relationship God wants with us. 
That’s the relationship we should want with God. 
God already knows our thoughts - but He wants us to tell Him what we are thinking and feeling. 

And we need to listen to the sound of His Voice as He shares His thoughts with us. 

But how do I have this love for ME? 
How do I love me like God does, so that I can love others like I love myself? 

I can take notice more often of all the little treasures that God places in my day. 
- a good cup of coffee
- the rays of the morning sun breaking thru the clouds 
- the amazing sunsets that are picture perfect
- the sound of a bird singing loudly 
- the laughter of a child
- the twinkle in an older person’s eyes as they tell a story for the hundredth time 
How many treasures has He placed in my day for me to find today? 
Those treasures make me smile. 

I can read my Bible with an open mind and heart.
Not so intent on what I understand, or what sounds good to my ears - but really listening to hear what He is saying. 

I can listen to the lyrics of praise & worship songs, not just getting caught up in the emotions, or in the music.
But hear the words, let them soak into my heart, my mind, and my spirit. 

I can just BE. 
Take a few minutes to just be still, be quiet, and breathe. 
Let thoughts ramble.
Let dreams spark. 
If any negative thoughts come, speak the Name of “Jesus”. 
If any worries enter, cry out to Jesus and let them go. 
This is a time for ME to listen to ME. 
Giving myself a moment to just breathe. 
This is not a colossal waste of time.
This is giving ME attention. 
​
Lord, I ask You for clarity and for creativity in just breathing. 
In Just Being. 
Show me what to do, and teach me the how. 
Just to love ME like You do - so that I can learn how to love others like I love myself. 
In Jesus’ Name I pray
Thank You
I love You.