If you read this and don't mind reading too much information
(for some) ...
Please say a prayer for me ...
I need wisdom and direction about what to do for me.
Having some health problems ... mostly to do with the "change"
I can handle the night sweats, the heat flashes (power surges),
the mood swings (maybe others can't, but I can - LOL) ... I can handle just about all of it - even the aches and pains of hormones changing.
What I am at the end of handling is the heavy periods.
October 1 this year will be 12 years. ENOUGH.
But without insurance (or a LOT of money) what am I supposed to do?
I don't know of any doctor that will see me even for a
consultation out of compassion or sympathy. Let alone a lab and hospital that will run the tests and do any surgery (such as a hysterectomy) without insurance or an assurance of money up front.
But I have had ENOUGH of all this.
I have prayed and cried.
Tried to believe God's Word for healing.
Bargained with God.
Argued with God.
Gotten angry with God and with my body.
Even tried to just give up and accept it all.
I have tried about all the "remedies" that are known.
Consulted with those that are supposed to know the "healthy and natural" way thru it all.
I have researched until I feel "stupid".
*I seriously do not know what to do now. I don't know how to
keep on going with all of it ... but I don't know how to change it either.
It has taken a serious toll on my body, my mind, my heart, my
It has changed me.
And I don't like it.
It has also taken a serious toll on our marriage relationship.
(TMI?) We know that physical intimacy is not what our marriage is based upon, but there is a need (desire) for it in marriage.
It has caused me many hours alone - at home, in the bathroom,
even at truck stops (because the place of delivery had no bathroom available).
Hours upon days away from Rick - when I could have gone with him, but due to the need for a bathroom, I wasn't allowed by my body.
Many church services and fellowships missed - hard to go when knowing that I would spend more time alone in the bathroom than not.
Hours and events away from my kids and grandkids - how do I
insist that whatever they want to do, wherever they want to go, has a bathroom available? And besides - if I am in the bathroom so much, I am not with them anyway.
So, I am seeking God - to know His way thru all this change. To know if there is an answer ... or do I just continue to breathe in and breathe out.
I have never felt so alone and lonely.
Oh, I know there are other women who deal with this as well - it's just hard to find one. Because this is not a "common ground" that you enjoy talking about. It is a NIGHTMARE that you live with - day and night. No matter where you are, or what you are doing, or who you are with. Sigh.
Lord, help me please.