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Little by Little ... Choosing my OR

Realizations

1/19/2021

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Not everyone has the same life.
Not everyone weighs the same.
Not everyone needs to lose the same number of pounds.
Not everyone can do every exercise.
Not everyone has the same food in the house.
Not everyone serves the same number of people, nor eats the same number of times per day.
These, and more, should be a given.
But, when you are reading the diet plans and programs? 
You, or at least I did, find yourself feeling inadequate, falling short, failing before beginning.
For me? 
I rarely eat breakfast. 
I usually only eat one meal, and one snack (maybe) per day.
I am a Coffee Queen - it’s addicted to me, so I must rule, right? 
I cannot afford a lot of the ingredients in most of the “healthy” recipes that I find - 
- sometimes I can’t even FIND those ingredients, because I do not live in a big city where there are many shopping choices.
I am only ONE person, and there’s just not a lot of inexpensive meals that can be cooked for only 1 person - well, that are nutritious and enjoyable to eat. 
Having arthritis and injuries makes me unable to get in some of the positions used in the exercises.
Where I live currently there are about 9 steps to go down (and back up), which to some people do not sound like many - but when faced with the physical limitations that I find myself with at this time? 
- those are mountains to be climbed when coming back up! 
Also, where I live, while a gorgeous location on the west side of Possum Kingdom Lake in Texas, there is a hill to go down before getting to the county road. Which means, after walking on the beautiful & quiet county road, I must climb the hill to get back to the mountain of steps before I can enter the apartment. Again, my physical limitations.
So, more often than not, when reading and researching for help, guidance and instruction on how to lose the weight and get in shape, I find defeat FIRST. 
Which leads me to this blog.
I can choose to stay defeated. 
OR
I can take the time, weed thru all that I cannot afford, or cannot do, and get to what I can afford, and what I can do.
I choose OR. 
​
So what are my physical limitations?
1. To start with, being overweight. 100 pounds. Not because that is what a chart tells me. Not because that is what I have been counseled at being. 
I remember when I weighed in at 175 - 200 pounds. I looked good - to me. I felt good - to me. The charts still said I was overweight. But then, the charts all say I should weigh about 125 pounds! If I weighed in at that I would look like a literal skeleton with skin stretched taunt over it. NO. Not going for that look. 
2. Out of shape. Years of neglect to my own self care have led me to where I find myself. I spent a lifetime taking care of others, and putting myself last. Always last. 
3. Arthritis. I was diagnosed with osteoarthritis when I was 23 years old. I was told then that it was the more severe kind that advanced rapidly. The doctor said, “Margaret, if you stop moving and doing, you will be in a wheelchair in less than 6 months.” I have never stopped moving and doing. Still haven’t. Although now I cannot move or do as much, nor as quickly, often not as long, as I have always been able to do. 
4. At my last lab report, the marker for rheumatoid arthritis is at the highest without crossing the threshold of diagnosis. Doctor said that while she cannot “pronounce” the diagnosis, she was warning me that it is a very real possibility. Which could be the explanation for the increased pain, and the way my hands and feet are beginning to look. 
5. My right knee has little to no cartilage left in it.  I  severely tore the ligaments that surround the knee cap. I had a Baker’s cyst at the back of my knee for the last 30 odd years, but it exploded in one moment about 18 months ago - creating damage within and around the knee. There is a “rare liquid” in my ACL. Ortho said that while I am a good candidate for knee replacement, he hesitates and would like to push it out for as long as possible, because a knee replacement has a life expectancy of 10-12 years, and a person can only have 3 in a lifetime. He said that would put me around 89 years old without any options, and with my overall health, that would not be fair to me. So, wear a knee brace, and work on building up the muscles above and around the knee - little by little. And above all? BE CAREFUL TO NOT FALL OR TWIST IT! 
6. 8 years ago I had uterine cancer. The most aggressive kind. After the path report came back my GYN and Oncologist both told me (with neither knowing the other had said it) that had I not had a radical hysterectomy I would have had maybe 6 months of life left, and it would have been an excruciating 6 months. But, during surgery, the oncologist had to remove so many of my lymph nodes and veins surrounding everything that he said there would be a lingering side effect. Most people’s blood goes from heart to big toe and back to heart in less than 5 seconds. Mine takes about 30 seconds. Which means that my legs, ankles and feet swell if I am up on them too long at a time, or if I sit for too long  a time. Not just swell a little, either. Then, if the swelling doesn’t go down, they begin to weep. So, I am up and down a LOT in a day. 
7. I have no cartilage in my shoulders due to an accident in 1995 with being trapped between an iron gate and a 1500 pound cow. She wasn’t giving, neither was the iron gate. The only thing left was me! Ortho said at the time that it had literally squeezed all the cartilage out of my shoulders to the point that they are bone on bone. He said at the time that I only had about 75% use of my shoulders left, and that over time it would decrease. 
8. My right thumb has literally fallen off my hand. It’s out of joint. Surgery is not an option, because there’s nothing he can do to fix it. He said that it shows “marked over-use”, basically it is worn out!  So, I also wear a hand brace. 
​
I did not share this info to garner sympathy. Only to say that when looking at exercise programs, these things are not taken into consideration by the trainers and leaders. 
Which again, leaves me feeling abandoned, alone, and defeated more than not. 
And that leads me to a choice.
Stop. Quit. Allow the limitations to take control. End up with no range of motion. 
OR
Figure out a way to get some exercise and walking every day, limber up, move as much as I can until I can do more - then do MORE.
I choose OR. 
This is about finding what works for me. 
Perhaps it will encourage and help you to find what works for you, too. 
Join me? 
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    Momma, you're not fat. You're fluffy!

    These were the words of my precious little girl one day many years ago. The innocence of a child. The words both stung my eyes, and warmed my heart. 
    I have struggled with my weight since I was 8 years old. Trying one diet after another. Some with momentary success, others with no success at all. At 59 years old? I'm done. No more. Enough of the ups & downs. 
    I would say this is my LAST attempt at weight loss - and perhaps that is the way to say it. But I want it to be more than "attempt". I want this to WORK.
    With Grit, Determination, Stubbornness, Sassiness, and the Boldness that comes from being a Girl of the South. All seasoned with Love, with Laughter, and with Grace. For ME.
    **If you go back thru these posts to the beginning, you will get a clearer picture of my personal struggles. Hopefully from this point forward it will not sound like a classic re-run ;) **

    **Beginning with 1/7/2021 - you can also find these posts on the blog Little by Little ... Choosing my OR

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​
God is God over the storms in my life & world -
and I am His.
Trusting in Him. Holding to His Promises as He holds me.

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Learning to laugh, to love, & to live ... again - without Rick, but with God

Life goes on ... even when we don't want it to.

Great grief is indicative of a great Love.

Rick, my Sweetheart.
Margaret, his Beloved.
Always & Forever.
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©Margaret McCoy, Coffee Love Princess
  • Coffee Love
  • My shoebox
    • Who, or what, am I?
    • Way of Wonder
    • Did You Know?
    • Stay the Course
    • Respect, Honor, Gratitude
    • We Remember
    • Favorite Links
    • Junk Drawer
  • Scattered Feathers
    • Faith Statement
    • Hope in Song
    • Memes to Remember
    • Coffee Love Images
    • Moments to Memories
    • Kids & grandkids
    • Those Gone Before Me
    • Roots & Wings
    • Love Notes
    • ^Angel^ Memories
  • Hungry?
    • Appetizers
    • Bread
    • Casseroles
    • Crockpot Love
    • Meats
    • Veggies
    • Desserts - oh my!
  • Adventures in Life
    • Little by Little
    • Calendar
  • Hitch Your Wagon
  • Experience Pearls