For me, this has been a long and difficult winter.
I came home to Texas the weekend before Thanksgiving 2019. Just about 3 1/2 months ago. So much has changed about ME since that long drive from Paris KY to Sulphur Springs TX. A river of tears has been cried, and dried. A million thoughts. A thousand or more prayers. Time with the kids and grandkids, for the most part good times. Reflecting moments. Deep breathing discussions. And I wait for that Texas spring time, when the cold wind does not blow, & when the sun shines bright. The trees will bud forth new growth. The flowers will bloom in all their glory. The grass will turn green and begin to wave in the late afternoon breezes. There is a smell on these spring days here in Texas that is like no where else that I have been. I haven't been everywhere, yet, lol - but I've been plenty. No other smell like a Texas spring time day. I have been walking when I can, mostly. I have missed some opportunities, but trying not to miss too many. February was not a kind month to me physically. The wind blew cold more than not. An earache kept me out of the wind, and when I did venture out in the wind, I was quickly reminded as to why I should not! Tummy troubles, and much arthritis pain. I am firmly believing that losing the 100 pounds WILL indeed help with the arthritis pain, and I realize that beginning the moving around is NOT going to feel the best. I also know that I must take it slow and easy to begin with - especially with the knee injury I am still healing from. Even if I do get frustrated and discouraged. Little by little ... that's the only way! I was complaining a little to my daughter about how slow I am. Her response was perfectly spot on! "Momma, every step you take, every move you make - it's better than sitting on your butt!" And she said, "Momma the ONLY competition should be with yourself, doing better today than you did yesterday." Thank you sweet baby girl for understanding where I am, without my words. In this waiting time, I am struggling to make sure it is not wasted time. Yes, I am resting more than I have in ages. Even taking naps - sometimes twice a day! Not being lazy, but recovering. I realize that I have been thru a LOT these last few years. And it has taken much out of me. It's time to put some back. I'm also trimming my eating down, way down. Learning to listen well to my body. Not to eat just because someone else is, nor because the clock says it is meal time. Working on exchanges and substitutions, too. I will be sharing more and more of that in the coming days. This time is about ME. Different comfort zone than I've ever been in. God is good though, He has His hand on the small of my back, gently leading me - softly encouraging me.
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Momma, you're not fat. You're fluffy!These were the words of my precious little girl one day many years ago. The innocence of a child. The words both stung my eyes, and warmed my heart. Archives
February 2021
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