Sitting here this morning, almost afternoon, thinking about life.
As a widow. 2 weeks from today it will be 8 years. As a momma and a grannee, to those who are grown, adulting, living their own lives. I guess it would be right to say that I am a bit "moody & blue" today. Melancholy, I suppose. - except the definition for "melancholy" says it means "depressed". I am not depressed - or at least I do not feel depressed. It's more of a sadness - for what was, for what is not now. A sadness for what I thought there was. A sadness for the realizations now of what there isn't, what there never was. It's not a time for me to curl up and cry myself into sleep and oblivion. It's more like a time of quietness and reflection. A time of letting go. A time of taking that next step. Even if I don't see that next step - still time to raise my foot and put it somewhere! Thinking I will order a pizza and salad - that way I don't have to cook, or even think about finding something to eat. Then, work on finishing Joshua's quilt for his birthday later this week. Maybe find a movie to watch - hopefully one that will make me laugh out loud for a little while. It's Sunday. Easter. And here I am alone. But, knowing that it's ok. To be alone. It's weird.
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So why "Scattered Feathers" ? ? ?You can read it here Past Posts
April 2023
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