 Wow. Just wow. Unbelievable that it has been a MONTH since I have written here ... I'm sorry. This has been a LONG month ... I have thought about writing every day -- but haven't. I know there are readers, and I am sorry ... However, here is an update ... albeit a LONG one ... not quite as long as the month ... but still ... 
 The Norovirus has made it's foul and nasty rounds here ... Jimmy and Mary Lou (Rick's parents), Mandy and the kids, Rick, and then me. Jimmy was at the doctor a couple of times. Mandy and the kids found themselves at the ER late one night. Thankfully, Rick was only down with it for a day. And I had it for a little over a couple of days. The doctor told us that it is a nasty type of stomach flu - and he was NOT missing the mark! In fact, I don't think he used strong enough language to describe it!!! Oh my word!!! Horrible!!! So thankful that the Lord spared us all from anything worse. 
 Doctor appointments yesterday for Rick and for me. Rick -- is doing good. We won't get the results of the blood work until early next week. But, Dr Greenwell said that as far as he can tell from the exam and last month's blood work, Rick is doing very good as a dialysis patient. The main issue of conversation was the diabetes, his blood sugar. Still not as low as Dr would like to see it. Running in the 200's and low 300's. Better than it was last year at this time - 400 to 600! But not as good as it needs to be. So ... 35 units of Lantus in the a.m. and 30 units in the p.m. Rick was complaining about the pain of the shots - and Dr Greenwell told him that there was one way, and one way only, to get away from the insulin shots ... EXERCISE! EXERCISE! EXERCISE! Me -- complete blood work was done. Will be next week for me, too, to get the results. A couple of Sunday's ago, I was awaken around 2 a.m. with a severe pain in my lower right leg, just on the outside edge. It was swollen and hot, and red. The pain was intense! My first thought was a spider bite. But as Rick and I examined it, there was no indication of a bite of any kind. ? I spent the whole week with my leg elevated, iced down, and taking aspirin every 4 hours. Finally, the majority of the swelling and redness went away. And i could finally tolerate walking on it without such pain. But when Dr Metzger looked at it, he diagnosed cellulitis. He said that it probably had been an acute case of cellulitis, and with elevation, ice and aspirin, it had taken most of it down. However, without antibiotics it is still present in the leg and in my system. Hence the overall tiredness and achiness i have been feeling all this week. As well as the headache from the dark netherworld! A headache worse than any migraine I have ever had - and i have suffered with migraines since i was a teenager! The antibiotics will begin in the morning ... and hopefully will soon knock this out!!! 
 My oldest sister, Mary Ellen Joslin, has died. She had had COPD for quite a while. Then got pneumonia before Christmas. She was in ICU for a while, then transferred to a room. Soon she had improved enough to be moved to a rehab facility for breathing therapy. However, the pneumonia came back. And the dr said that they had already given her all the medications that she could tolerate. That her body was tired. And the best they could do was to keep her comfortable and as pain free as possible. She has been at rest a week now ... We said our final good-byes last Friday afternoon. She was the oldest of us 5 kids, and by the time i came along (the baby of the family) she had 4 kids already. I grew up with her kids - felt most of the time that i was one of hers, rather than a "sister". We spent many days at their house, or them at our house. Sister was always there - working hard no matter what was going on. She had a cup of coffee or a glass of Pepsi at hand, a smile on her face, and hard work in her heart. Life happens and we go our separate ways. Still seeing one another, but not spending "time" together. I have always been proud of her - giving so much of herself to her family, and to her work. My heart and spirit grieves, and the memories leak out of my eyes and down my cheeks ... I love you Sister. I really, really do love you. You raised a strong family, a loving family, a family that may fight and argue at times, a family that laughs together, a family that loves one another with a passion ... and a family that is bound together, and will stay together. I love your kids so much! And oh - your grandkids and great's, I absolutely adore! You did GOOD!!! And I will continue to love them and theirs as long as i have breath - in honor of you. I love you Sister. Rest now - high on that mountain ... Watch over yours, wait for us. We will see you again ... I love you. There are 3 of us kids left ... Billy, Bettie, and me. 
 These days and nights are the easiest nor the best. In fact, we have had some of the worst it seems lately. But, we know that God is still God and He is still and always good and faithful. We are tired and worn. Just plain weary. Trying to find that time alone with Jesus every day. We NEED the peace, the strength and the hope that is only found at His feet and in His arms. We have laughed a lot this month too. Spent time with Aunt Jerry one day going thru some of her picture albums, and listening to some good stories on different family members! LOL Spent time with Mary Lou going thru some of her pictures. And with Tina. I am working on these pictures, getting them put on Facebook, uploaded to Wal-mart so that we can have copies made, and making a new website - to be revealed in a little while :) ... We have read The Shack - finally ... my daughter :-) ... it was good. A very thought provoking book. We would highly recommend it to anyone! Looking forward to reading it again before too much longer :-)! 
 One of the stressful things of this month is to find out that i have been dropped from the 100% care at MD Anderson - due to the new stricter guidelines of Obamacare as of January 1, 2014. Needless to say, there were tears of anger and frustration, tears of worry and stress. Not only by me, but by the lady from MD Anderson who had to call me and give me the news. I now have to apply either for health insurance or for a waiver of exemption. If i am approved for either one - then, i can re-apply with MD Anderson and we go from there. I know that God is the Great Physician and the Gentle Healer - and He does not need Obamacare nor even MD Anderson to take care of me ... but yes, i am afraid. I Trust in HIM, but i am afraid. On a better note - the guy from the disability office told Rick that he should have his determination letter soon. Said that everything looks good and there shouldn't be any problems. I hope not!!! That would be good news! I don't know what God has planned for us the rest of this year ... but I do know that the God of angel armies is always by our side. So, no matter what - we will be ok ... 
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Learning to laugh, to love, & to live ... again - without Rick, but with God Life goes on ... even when we don't want it to. Great grief is indicative of a great Love. Rick, my Sweetheart. Margaret, his Beloved. Always & Forever. |
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