Coffee Love
  • Coffee Love
  • My Profile
    • I Believe
    • Stories from the Mists
    • Stay the Course
    • Respect, Honor, Gratitude
    • Favorite Links
  • Scattered Feathers
    • When You Need the Music
    • Coffee Love Images
    • Take it to the Roots
    • Love Notes
  • My Recipe Book
    • Appetizers
    • Bread
    • Casseroles
    • Crockpot Love
    • Meats
    • Veggies
    • Desserts - oh my!
  • Junk Drawer
    • Worth Sharing
    • Helpful Hints
  • Contact Me

Life without You ... Stevie Ray Vaughan

12/10/2015

0 Comments

 
Life without you ... this song was shared to me this morning by a special friend in my life.
I don't know how to walk this walk of grief ... i don't know how to live without Rick. This is all new for me. And just like the rest of life - there is no manual. no instructions. no how-to make it thru with any semblance of sanity. 

But i thank God that i am not alone in this.
I have one in my life who walks with me, who talks with me, who shares the heart and soul of this life with me.
Thank you.
One who has been there for me in the middle of the day when the memories are overwhelming and takes my breath away. This one gets it. This one's breath is taken away by this walk, too. 
One who says a sweet good morning - because that is one of those times i feel the most alone. 
One who whispers a precious good night - because the loneliness is almost too much to bear those moments before closing my eyes. 
How precious is a friendship with one who gets this life.
I wish a thousand times over that we had never met - because that would mean that our loved ones had not left us. But a thousand times over i am thankful that if we must walk this way, at least we can be friends in it together. 

Music has always been a major force in my life. From the time i can barely remember as a kid growing up. A radio played. A record was turning. And when there was neither - Momma sang. God love that woman - she couldn't carry a tune in a bucket! But she sang - with her heart and soul. She sang.

And then, with Rick.
When words would not come for either of us - there was always a song. A song to be shared. A song to be remembered. 
How many times did he call me from work - even before cell phones - and tell me to listen to a certain song that was playing on the radio? 
How many times he called the radio station and requested a song be played for me - at a certain time.
How much money have we spent thru the years on 8-tracks (yes, i am that old), cassettes, CD's? 
Concerts that we have went to, somehow affording the time and the money. 
Nights when we would sit under the stars and he would softly sing - song after song after song. Until his voice literally gave out. And still leave me wanting more. 
Times when i could not sleep, troubled with life - and he would hold me in his arms, and just sing to me. Calming me and quieting me. Making me just to know that no matter what - everything would somehow be ok.

In all of the sickness and hard times that we endured those years, Music was the anchor for our hearts and souls. 
Hours upon hours we listened to the music. Music had a way of easing Rick's pain when the medications would not. And music touched that place deep within him and brought peace to him in the worst of times. 
The last few months of his life, the music was not fully shared. He had a set of earphones and he wore them, listening to the music. It was like he needed to be as close to the music as he could be. 

But ... for these last 33 weeks, i have listened to very little music.
It was just too much for me to bear.
My soul was in darkness.
My spirit was crushed.
I cry enough tears without the music. Or so i thought. 

I am slowly finding out that the tears i cried without the music were so completely different than the tears with the music.
The tears with the music actually feel like healing tears.
cleansing tears.
tears that hold more hope than despair.
tears that hold promise of tomorrow,
not just the emptiness of today. 

So, to this one who has shared the music with me - thank you.
You are helping me in ways that i have no words to explain ... but there will be a song that i will share with you one day. 
​Thank you. 
0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    So why "Scattered Feathers" ? ? ? 

    You can read it here

    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture

    Past Posts

    January 2023
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    August 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    October 2017
    August 2017
    June 2017
    January 2017
    November 2016
    October 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012
    August 2011
    July 2011
    June 2011
    April 2011
    March 2011
    February 2011
    October 2010

    RSS Feed

    Picture
Website designed & developed by Margaret McCoy

​
God is God over the storms in my life & world -
and I am His.
Trusting in Him. Holding to His Promises as He holds me.

​
Learning to laugh, to love, & to live ... again - without Rick, but with God

Life goes on ... even when we don't want it to.

Great grief is indicative of a great Love.

Rick, my Sweetheart.
Margaret, his Beloved.
Always & Forever.
​
Picture
©Margaret McCoy, the Queen of Kamelot Coffee 
  • Coffee Love
  • My Profile
    • I Believe
    • Stories from the Mists
    • Stay the Course
    • Respect, Honor, Gratitude
    • Favorite Links
  • Scattered Feathers
    • When You Need the Music
    • Coffee Love Images
    • Take it to the Roots
    • Love Notes
  • My Recipe Book
    • Appetizers
    • Bread
    • Casseroles
    • Crockpot Love
    • Meats
    • Veggies
    • Desserts - oh my!
  • Junk Drawer
    • Worth Sharing
    • Helpful Hints
  • Contact Me