Some momma and grannee thoughts ...

First of all - a shout out to my son ... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
I am so thankful for the blessing and joy of being his momma!!! I am proud of the man he has become and continues to become. Rejoicing that he knows our Father in heaven and walks with Him. Joshua is a good husband, a good daddy, and a "perfect" son. :-) I love him!!!

***
I have been doing a LOT of thinking and praying these last few days … just trying to deal with this life of being on the road. 
It’s not easy. 

I miss my kids and grandkids – especially at the holidays. Just want to be with them so much!!! Needing some “momma” and “grannee” time!!! Time when we aren’t rushed to get back
on the road. 
 
I realize that this is the life we have – and we have to find a
way to make the best of it … I’m trying … I’m praying! 
 
*There are those that say we have a “choice” in what we do … maybe so – to some degree. 
But at this stage in our life, and with the economy as it is --- truck driving seems to be the answer. Not so much our "choice" as what is available ... 
 
I’m really not having a pity party – just trying to face reality …  
Rick is 52 years old. Not in the best of health.
He has a lot of sales experience, but he isn’t in “demand” … either over qualified, or not young enough. Companies mostly
want someone who has a “degree” … sigh. 

We have lived our lives thru all these years with him working and me staying at home. Me taking care of the kids and the house. When we first got married, he said that he would make the living, if I would make the living worthwhile – and
that is exactly what I dedicated my heart and soul to do … for him, for our kids, for anyone who came to our house. 
 
All through the years, Rick and I talked about the time in our life when the kids would be grown and living their lives, how that it would be the time for “US” … to basically do what we wanted, go where we wanted, enjoy life. 
 
Then, LIFE happens. Loss of job ... moves ... loss of health to a great degree ...
And now? 
 
If I stay at home, we will be apart far more than we will be together. And besides– what will I do with all those hours alone? I spent a lifetime being a wife and a momma. A homemaker for my family. Very few days of working outside the home. It was our choice. A good choice for us. Maybe it wouldn't work for everyone - but it worked for us ... 
until now ... 

And if I go with him, well, life isn’t easy or perfect on the road either. 
Sigh.
 
So, I think and I pray a LOT …. 
Mostly- 
Lord, move. 
Or move me.