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Catching up for August ... 

8/24/2013

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((Written 8/3/13))
Been here at Joshua and Dessie's for a week now. They are working to get Internet into the house, but it hasn't happened yet. So ... these blog posts will be sporadic at best - whenever I can get into town and use the Wi-Fi. 

It has been so good to be with the kids and grandkids - just to hear their voices, the laughter. To get the hugs and kisses from the grandkids. 
Rick and I splashed and played in the pool with the grandkids once this past week. Oh to have that kind of energy!!! LOL 

Joshua is working the long hours of living on a ranch this time of year ... I know he is tired and ready for the cooler weather!!! 

Rick and I have the month "off" from doctors - well, almost. Next appointments are after the 27th. Feels odd not having to be on the road so much, not having to sit at doctor's offices and wait. 

Chris and Mandy are looking at coming down here next weekend. I want that so much!!! I haven't had all my kids and grandkids together since last Labor Day!!! Even now I can hear the laughter, the noise - a much welcome NOISE!!! 

Dessie and I are going to start working with Kyla about school this next week. She had some learning issues last year, and we are hoping to cover some good ground these 3 weeks before school does start, and give her a more solid foundation for the new school year. 

*I would like to say all things are good while here ... but then, I have said since the beginning of this blog that I would be honest. And to say that all things are good (anywhere, anytime) would NOT be being honest. Sigh. 
I love my husband with an undying passionate love ... but life with him thru all this is NOT good. The struggle with perceptions, attitudes, wrong thinking ... I'm just tired and weary in this land of "recovery". 
He has always found validation and purpose in working. And to not have been working for 12 months now? Well ... he is finding it hard to get up and go on thru each day. Some days are better. Some days are worse. 
Please pray for him. He seems to teeter on the edge of depression and discouragement more than not these days. And honestly? I don't know what to do more than just pray. My prayers don't seem to make it much farther than the end of my nose, the heavens are like brass to me lately. It's just a difficult time. Pray for us both. 
I worry more about our kids and grandkids than I do the two of us. I just don't want "this" to invade their lives. KWIM? Sigh. 

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((8/13/13))
Chris, Mandy, Elijah, Brooklyn all came down this past weekend. They got here on Friday evening ... and didn't have to leave until early Sunday evening. It was AWESOME to have my kids and my grandkids together. 

I haven't had that for a year. They all came to our house last Labor Day and spent the weekend with us. I had just gotten the diagnosis of Cancer, and we were waiting to see if I was going to get into MD Anderson. That weekend last year was so precious to me. But this weekend was too. 

This weekend I was able to cook for them all - fixed Chicken Spaghetti, English Pea Salad (Joshua's favorite), Potato Salad, and Squash & Cheese Cornbread. Fixed so much that we were able to eat on it all weekend! LOL 

Saturday we laughed with the grandkids ... and swam in the pool with the kids and grandkids - that was a BLAST!!! P-paw and Grannee got splashed and waved and rocked ... so much laughter! Priceless treasures to my heart and soul. 

We were sitting in the pool just talking at one point, and I said, "I am going to fix Monkey Bread this weekend. When do y'all want it?" (I'm thinking early Sunday morning.) Joshua just looked over at me and said, "What are you doing in the pool?" We all laughed at how serious he is about Monkey Bread!!! 
And guess what? Yep. Momma got out, dried off, wrapped in a towel, and went to the kitchen. Homemade monkey bread on a hot Saturday afternoon!!! Can tell you this - that pan didn't last long! LOL 

After Monkey Bread came watermelon ... 2 were cut. One wasn't very good - but the other one was devoured! 

Later Saturday evening we sat around the bar and played cards. Played "Bull shit", and "Gin". Laughing so hard. 

Sunday morning I was blessed to cook breakfast for everyone. It was a time of laughing and joking and teasing. 
After breakfast, Joshua & Dessie with Chris & Mandy took off for town - time for Joshua & Dessie to buy school supplies. P-paw and Grannee kept the taters ... and we laughed and laughed and laughed. It was good. 

When the big kids got home, it was time for Elijah and Brooklyn to ride the horses. They both sit a horse very well. Brooklyn is "in love" with horses and with riding. (Which does NOTHING to her Uncle Joshua's heart and soul!) 

The weekend ended, sadly. It was time for Chris, Mandy, Elijah and Brooklyn to pack up everything, load it and leave. It was a tearful time for us all. No one wanted it to be over. Least of all Momma and Grannee!!! I just could not bear to watch them drive away. I walked back into the house and began to pick up and clean up - trying to hold back the tears. I love them all so much!!! And I enjoy the times together more than these mere words could ever describe. 

Sunday evening for Joshua, Dessie, Shell, Kyla, P-paw and Grannee was spent quietly, watching a little TV and getting the school supplies all divided out and marked. Bedtime came and everyone went to bed ... Momma and Grannee lay there thinking back over the weekend, treasuring every moment deep into her heart and soul. 


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((8/14/13))Dessie and I worked with Kyla on her room Monday. We have been trying to figure out a way that works for her to keep her room neater and less cluttered. Dessie said that she wished she had the plastic stackable crates she saw at Wal-mart's. If she did that she would turn them on their sides and make like cubby-holes on the empty wall in Kyla's room. I suggested that since we have all these heavy cardboard boxes from the dialysis supplies, that we try them - see if the idea works before spending the money on the crates. So, we spent the better part of the morning cutting the flaps off the boxes, and building the "doll house I have always wanted" - Kyla's words. LOL It is SO cute - even if it is just cardboard boxes. And the best part? Kyla LOVES it!!! Now, we just have to wait the few days to see if the new wears off, or if she stays interested enough to keep her room picked up. 

Rick took the car into the shop on Tuesday. The AC quit working ... the new battery died. ??? He called the shop in SS and they said that the Cadillacs have a re-set that must be done if the battery is disconnected for any length of time. So, Rick charged the battery, and got it into Graham to O'Reilly's. 
They tested the battery - showed less than 1/3 charge. This is the 3rd NEW battery that we have put on the car in the last 2 months. Something is NOT right. They then tested the alternator - showed some problems with charging. Rick drove it out to Affordable Car Care in Graham. Dessie and I went and picked him up. They will either diagnose it today or tomorrow. Sigh. Rick said that he feels like we have about reached the point of no more work on that car. He is considering looking for something newer with less miles on it. 

We are leaving here next Wednesday or Thursday. Originally had intended to stay until the day after school starts, the 27th. But I have a complete blood work to do on 8/23, and a mammogram at 9:30 on the 23rd. My doctor's appointment in SS is on Tuesday 8/27. Rick's dialysis center appointment is the 28th. And I go to MD Anderson on 9/5. A busy couple of weeks. 
Please pray for us in all the travels of getting to and from the doctors and hospitals. Especially with this car!!! And if not this car - then ??? 
Also, pray for us concerning the tests and appointments - praying that we will get good reports all the way around!!! 

Rick's blood pressure has been running on average 146/82 - not bad considering what it was running!
And his blood sugar is averaging 140!!! A major drop from the 300's and 400's that we had been dealing with!!! He is still taking 4 mg of Glimepiride every morning and every evening, and 30 units of insulin morning and night. 
The UF numbers on the cycler are usually high - which is a good thing, it is taking more fluid off than it is putting in. 

It is raining out here today!!! We woke up with a 70% chance of rain!!! It smells good, looks good, sounds good!!! We will all gladly and thankfully accept the rain and the mud!!! Praying that it rains ALL DAY LONG!!! With little to no stopping or slacking off!!! Lord, please bless us all INDEED!!! 

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God is God over the storms in my life & world -
and I am His.
Trusting in Him. Holding to His Promises as He holds me.

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Learning to laugh, to love, & to live ... again - without Rick, but with God

Life goes on ... even when we don't want it to.

Great grief is indicative of a great Love.

Rick, my Sweetheart.
Margaret, his Beloved.
Always & Forever.
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©Margaret McCoy, the Queen of Kamelot Coffee 
  • Coffee Love
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    • Desserts - oh my!
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